


I've Won This Game a Hundred Times

by Plasticnojidousha



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-12 11:06:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28634463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Plasticnojidousha/pseuds/Plasticnojidousha
Summary: Jun needs a new song for the group's anniversary tour and he is determined to get elusive songwriter Ninomiya Kazunari to write it for him.
Relationships: Matsumoto Jun/Ninomiya Kazunari
Comments: 15
Kudos: 49





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I had no choice after reading your love letter, Jun-pon. Had I?"

Jun has rarely noticed the ticking of the clock on the wall in the rehearsal room before. But without the usual chatter, loud music and sneakers stomping on the floor to the rythm of a new choreography to fill the room, the clock ticking echoes loudly with each passing second. It's past midnight and Jun is still sitting in the same spot that he has occupied for most of the day, going through the folder of concept proposals for the upcoming tour once again. Yasu, their long-term collaborator and tour manager is sitting across the table, patiently waiting for him to make up his mind. When Jun looks up at him he can see tiredness and lack of sleep on his face, probably a reflection of his own. Which is worrying, since his existence as a member of the top idol group in the country relies, at least partially, on his face.

He takes off his glasses and massages his temples, accepting that no matter how much longer he looks at this concept book, the answers he's looking for won't come tonight.

He finally admits defeat. "Let's call it a day." He says, stretching. 

He starts gathering his stuff strewn across the table, putting it in his backpack as he gets ready to leave. At the end of the room, his manager, who he suspects has been dozing off for the past hour or two, scrambles to his feet to get to the door before him. Jun bids Yasu good night and pats him on the shoulder, a token of appreciation, as he walks past him on his way out.

As he slumps on the back seat of the car, fighting the drowsiness that always falls over him in the dark, comfortable space, he thinks of the tour he's in charge of planning to mark the group's anniversary in the autumn. So many moving pieces and decisions still in the air, yet time keeps ticking irremediably. At crucial times like this, he wishes humans could function without sleep. Nonetheless he surrenders to the darkness enveloping him as he closes his eyes, aided by the slight swaying motion of the car as it glides below the bright billboards of Roppongi.

No matter how late he works, the next day arrives promptly and without mercy. After managing to drag himself out of bed and take a shower, he busies himself in the kitchen cutting up fruit for his breakfast smoothie. He mentally runs through his to-do list for the day while distractedly humming along to the background music playing a random selection of his Spotify favourites.

A smile spreads across his face with the first notes of an upbeat song. One of his favourites by genius singer-songwriter Ninomiya Kazunari. This one is a few years old, but Jun still recalls how he had this album on loop for weeks when it first came out and wouldn't shut up about how great it was until his friends couldn't take it anymore. It earned him the reputation of being a Nimomiya fanboy. Which of course he denies. The fact that he owns all of Ninomiya's published music and has read all the interviews he's agreed to (which are not that many and Jun also likes that mysterious artist aura) is just for investigation purposes, as an artist himself. Unfortunately, Ninomiya rarely sings his own creations nowadays and prefers to write for other artists. Jun still enjoys the characteristic songwriting but misses the raw emotion that Ninomiya himself conveyed as a singer.

Jun sighs as the song finishes. If only they could have a song like this for the anniversary tour... He takes a sip of the freshly prepared drink.

_If only._

He pauses. Can they have a song like this? Yes, Ninomiya is notoriously picky about his collaborations, but Jun's group is the top recording artist in the country. Maybe they have a chance?

Jun puts down the glass, getting more and more excited with each passing second. He unlocks his phone and opens the group chat, his heart beating loudly with anticipation.

The manager's apologetic smile does nothing to subdue Jun's annoyance. He inhales and counts to 10 internally before replying, to avoid snapping at the poor man. He doesn't want to add to his reputation of being short tempered that's become a bit of a running joke among the rest of the group and staff.

"Thank you Asou-kun." He says instead and sees how the man relaxes, a relieved look on his face before he heads for the door, turning to bow lightly at him before exiting.

Jun is left alone once again in the recording room adjacent to their rehearsal space. He leans back in the well-worn sofa. " _Sorry, but Ninomiya-san doesn't work with idol groups_ " is what every member of the staff has come back with after contacting Ninomiya's office. Not one of them has managed to arrange a meeting between both parties. Hell, they haven't even been able to get past the reception staff. He decides to take matters into his own hands.

It's late and Jun is at home after another long day of planning and rehearsals. He would have gotten home at a decent hour if Shun and Toma hadn't called as he was in the car, just leaving the agency and convinced him to go out for dinner after work. Not one to ever reject the offer of food and drinks in the company of his closest friends, Jun asked the driver to turn around and head to Shibuya instead.

It had proven to be the perfect way to unwind and put the Ninomiya situation out of his mind for a few hours. But now that he's home alone, his brain inevitably returns to the problem at hand.

It's been a few weeks and he's had the same success as his staff. That is: zero.

He calls every few days and Ninomiya's staff politely tell Jun they'll pass the message on, but his phone remains silent day after day. It's obvious that he needs to rethink his strategy. Even though he's got a few backup options, he's not ready to give up on Ninomiya just yet, much to the exasperation of his manager and fellow group members.

Too restless to sleep, he sits down at the wooden table in the corner of his living room that acts as his workspace and, grabbing paper and his favourite pen, he writes a letter addressed to Ninomiya. He pours all his thoughts into it, starting from the first time he heard one of Ninomiya's songs and how it left him frozen on the spot in the middle of Tower Records when he was just starting out in music himself. Then moving on to talk about the group's anniversary, the feelings they want this song to convey and even his dreams of going into the international stage one day. It's probably too long, too rambling and way more sincere that he'd be able to achieve if he wasn't still buzzed from the drinks earlier.

Once he's finished and without giving himself time to rethink it, he seals it and puts it inside his work folder to give to his manager first thing in the morning. Then, while humming the song he was just writing about, he takes a bath and goes to bed.

A few more days go by with radio silence from Ninomiya. Stubbornly, Jun carries on with the tour preparations day after day, deciding on video effects, lights and costumes, regardless of the missing anniversary song.

At lunch time, Jun finally takes a break and pours himself a cup of tea before joining his fellow group members at the table in the rehearsal room. They are crowding around someone's phone laughing about the fans' reaction to their latest TikTok video. Today he's making an exception and his carefully prepared bento sits untouched in his bag, as Yasu brought cream croquettes from a famous shop as omiyage, just in time for their lunch break.

Settling back into his chair away from the rowdy group, Jun pulls out his own phone as he bites happily into one of the crunchy golden croquettes when Yasu appears and sits down on the chair next to him. In that moment he realises he just swallowed Yasu's bait, his latest effort to convince him to forget Ninomiya by mellowing him out with his favourite food. The creamy potato mash in his mouth turns sour and he looks at his friend with distrust.

"Jun-kun, about the anniversary song..." He starts.

"Don't worry about it. I'm on it." Jun cuts in.

"But you haven't yet heard back from Ninomiya-san, have you?"

Jun lets out a sigh "No, but I want to make sure we've exhausted all possibilities with him. If the tour starts in October, we still have two months to get it recorded and have enough time to shoot the video."

"The staff is getting antsy, we will run out of time soon." Yasu replies, lowering his voice so the staff buzzing around can't hear.

"If we don't hear back by the end of next week, I promise I will call someone else. Now let me enjoy your dirty bribe here." He waves the croquette in his hand in his direction.

Inevitably, the much awaited call arrives when Jun is least expecting it. He has stepped out to the conbini close to his apartment and has forgotten his phone. He doesn't think much of it, it's only a few minutes and, in his defense, most business calls don't happen at 10pm on a Friday. When he gets home and he sees the missed call notification blinking in his phone, he still doesn't think much of it, it's probably his mother asking about the latest healthy cooking trend she's heard about. When he brings the phone close to his ear to listen to the voicemail, he's definitely not expecting to hear a young woman with a polite tone inviting him to meet Ninomiya-san in his studio the following week. He nearly drops it from the shock. Giddy, he replays the message a few more times before sending a message to the group line chat and to Yasu. He needs to use all his self-control not to write _I told you so_.

Since Jun caught Ninomiya's attention by addressing him personally, he decides to attend the appointment by himself despite the complaints of his manager, who reluctantly drops him off in front of a stylish building in Daikanyama. Instead of a modern high-rise, Ninomiya's studio occupies the top two floors on a four story new construction with an abundance of greenery and natural light. One of those eco-efficient buildings. As Jun steps in, he thinks he would even feel calm in these surroundings, if not for the fact that he's about to meet one of his musical heroes.

He is greeted by a young woman at the door who sounds very much like the one in his voicemail and leads him along the corridor finishing in a bright and sunny reception area with a big L-shaped couch and a few colourful chairs backed against a window that stretches floor to ceiling. To the left there is a small kitchen area with tea, coffee and pastries already laid out for guests on the smooth marble counter. The woman tells him that Ninomiya will be with him shortly and invites Jun to help himself to food and drinks while he waits.

When Ninomiya finally appears along the corridor heading towards the lounge, Jun springs up to his feet. Being a Ninomiya Kazunari fanboy - not that he'll ever admit it - he recognises the small frame and the messy black hair with a fringe darkening the man's eyes from the few photos of him that float around the internet. He's wearing an oversized t-shirt in a pale lavender tone and black jeans and Jun notices he is carrying a Nintendo Switch on his hand. His hands start to sweat, but for all of Jun's nervous stiffness, Ninomiya is the perfect picture of a relaxed and carefree person.

Ninomiya stops and looks at Jun head to toe, as if he's trying to figure out who the stranger in his lounge is. The silence stretches for a moment, awkward, before Jun bows politely, eager to make a good first impression.

"Ninomiya-san, I really appreciate you taking time off your busy schedule to meet me."

Ninomiya tilts his head and looks at Jun with an amused expression on his face. "That's right. I took time off Splatoon for you. And I was about to rank up, too." He says, waving the console in his hand.

Jun doesn't know how to take it. Is it meant to be a joke? The next moment Ninomiya takes a few steps and perches himself on one of the stools by the kitchen counter, next to the french pastries. He props his elbows on the counter and holds the console up in front of his face. Even if Jun can't see the screen from where he is, he can tell by the concentration in his eyes and the swift movements of his fingers that he started playing.

 _Unbelievable_.

He shifts uncomfortably on his feet, unsure of what to do. 

"Sit down, Jun-pon." Ninomiya says without taking his eyes off the screen.

_Jun-pon?_

Jun is torn between his dislike of being addressed by nicknames and elation of Ninomiya knowing his name well enough to come up with such a ridiculous one. Not that he should be that surprised, after all he did sign a letter with it and he is a member of the top idol band in the country, even if he's momentarily turned into a giddy fanboy.

He opts to let the nickname slide and sits back down on the couch obediently, looking towards Ninomiya who seems perfectly absorbed in his game. Is he just going to keep playing and ignore him? And if that's the case, why would he even accept the meeting in the first place? Maybe this is punishment for Jun's insistence. Maybe he annoyed the songwriter so much with his requests that he invited him here just to mock him.

He clenches his fists with determination and forces himself to get into work mode. They need the song no matter what, and he wants Ninomiya to be the one to write it. He is ready to do whatever it takes. If that means sitting here while being made a fool of by a quirky and possibly egomaniacal songwriter, that's a price he's ready to pay.

"Ninomiya-san, the reason behind my request..." He starts.

"We'll get to that in a minute." Ninomiya cuts in, over the fast-paced music coming from the game. "And call me Nino."

After a few minutes Ninomiya places the console on the counter and hops off the stool, he walks around the counter into the kichen and picks up one of the mugs that are neatly arranged against the wall.

"Do you want tea or coffee, Jun-pon?" He asks looking over, elbows propped on the counter.

Jun declines, which takes some effort, because how many times is he going to have a chance to have Ninomiya Kazunari prepare coffee for him? But he's on a strict water cleanse day. Ninomiya shrugs and carries on, placing a paper filter on the coffee maker followed by two spoonfuls of ground coffee from a tin with foreign letters on the front. Jun watches as he starts pouring hot water from a kettle over the ground coffee, his hands' movements precise with obvious practice. He vaguely wonders if they might move the same way over the strings of a guitar when he plays his songs. 

An inviting warm aroma fills the room by the time Ninomiya finishes preparing his coffee. 

"You're really persistent, aren't you?" Ninomiya turns around to face him, holding the steaming mug between his hands. "However there is a fine line between persistent and stupidly stubborn." He adds with a smirk.

It's something that Jun has heard often. Either said jokingly by his friends and colleagues or in a more reproachful, bitter way by staff, press or even some of the group's fans online. With time he's learned to accept that as a part of him, one that people bring up either as a virtue or as a fault. He is used to it, yet hearing it from Ninomiya triggers an involuntary reaction, blood flushing his face all the way to the tip of his ears. He lowers his head so Ninomiya can't see it, feeling a bit like a child being reprimanded by his teacher.

The songwriter walks back to his former spot and leans back on the counter with his eyes fixed on Jun.

"Since you seem to be familiar with my work, and no doubt my staff must have told you directly, you already know I don't work with idols." He says.

Jun takes the comment as a chance to make his case "This may sound selfish, but even so I still would like you to consider working with us. Ninomiya-san's songs..."

Ninomiya lets out an exaggerated sigh, cutting Jun's plea short.

"You really are too earnest." He says and Jun thinks he can hear some annoyance in his tone. There's a long pause before he continues "This is what we're going to do. You're going to come to the studio once a week, and any time I call you over to check on the progress of the song. You will give me your feedback then and, should I feel like it's not absolutely stupid, I might consider it."

It takes a moment for Jun to process the meaning behind Ninomiya's terms. He bows politely "Thank you. I'm looking forward to working together, Ninomiya-san."

Ninomiya sits back on the stool and picks up the game console again, his coffee mug now sitting on the counter next to him.

"There's one more term I forgot to our agreement. I said it's Nino, not Ninomiya-san. And you better lose that stuck-up business demeanor for next week too." 

Jun hasn't missed the overly casual way Ninomiya has spoken all through the meeting, if it could even be called that. Glancing at Ninomiya's mismatched socks resting on the stool, moving along slightly to the beat of the music, he feels overdressed in his favourite designer pinstripe two-piece suit. It is clear that Ninomiya doesn't stick to the usual ways to run a business, even if music can be considered a fairly relaxed industry already. 

"About the business terms and contracts..." Jun asks hesitantly.

"Just have someone from your agency contact my staff and they will work it out. I am not interested in such boring details and I'm sure you have better things to do, too" is his reply as he starts bashing buttons rapidly on his Switch, his gaze focused on the screen.

Jun remains seated, unsure if Ninomiya considers the meeting to be over or he's supposed to wait for him to grace him with his attention again. He looks at Ninomiya's small back, hunched over his console on the counter, and then around the room, bright with the afternoon sunlight that pours in through the large window behind Jun. He's feeling relieved, since Ninomiya has finally agreed to write the song, yet the strange way in which he has carried off the meeting makes Jun uneasy, like saying the wrong word at the wrong time to could make the songwriter throw the whole arrangement into the bin without thinking twice about it. 

A few minutes go by at a painfully slow pace, until at last the songwriter takes his eyes away from the screen briefly and breaks the silence once again. 

"I don't mind if you want to hang around, but if you don't have anything else to discuss I'll see you next Thursday. Ask Megumi-san to get you an appointment on your way out." He tells Jun.

Jun springs up to his feet and gives a small bow of the head that goes unaknowledged as Ninomiya has already gone back to his game. He stops before leaving the room, turns toward him and asks the question that has been burning on his lips.

"Can I ask... why did you decide to work with us, even though we are an idol group?" 

Ninomiya looks in his direction, a cat-like grin spreading over his face. 

"I had no choice after reading your love letter, Jun-pon. Had I?" he says, followed by a cheeky wink. 

If Jun had ever imagined how meeting Ninomiya Kazunari would be, he would have never come even close to the reality. 

Not that he ever has, he is a serious artist after all, not a fanboy, thank you very much. But _if_ he had ever come up with different made-up scenarios, he might have been disappointed at the mundane way it finally panned out, inbetween matches of a videogame and with Ninomiya wearing mismatched socks. 

Regardless, when he arrives at the office the next day, he is greeted by a chorus of congratulations and general excitement from his fellow group members and staff. Jun graciously accepts the pats on the back while hiding the uneasiness he is feeling after meeting Ninomiya. Telling the others would only make them worry at a time when they need to be focusing on rehearsals, so he does what he always does at times like this.

_To: Shun, Toma_   
_Shibuya yakiniku place on the slope, tonight at 9_

By 11pm Jun is half-sprawled atop the wooden table, meat long gone, his temple getting wet in the puddle of condensation left by his now empty highball glass.

"Seriously though, what is his problem? Looking down on idols so much. Sorry I am an idol, you pretentious bastard!"

"There, there Matsujun." Toma pats his back in a mock caring tone. "Here, have another drink." He grabs the glass the waitress just put down on the edge table and places it next to Jun, wrapping Jun's hand around it.

"And calling my letter a fucking _love letter_?"

"Wasn't it a love letter though? I know you're a total fanboy for this guy." Shun says.

"Shut up." Jun groans.

"Oh, is he not your type?"

"Fuck you, Shun."

A roar of laughter erupts from his two friends. Jun downs some of his drink and rests his face in the nook of his elbow over the table again.

"He's cute though. Too bad he's a sadistic diva with an inflated ego."

"Then you're just perfect for each other. Two of a kind." Shun retorts, prompting another chorus of laughter and this time Jun joins in.

The next Thursday he pushes the front door to Ninomiya's building in a better mood than he left last week after the first meeting. Partially thanks to the tension relieved during his drunken ranting session with his friends, but also from undeniable excitement for the meeting ahead. He never imagined Ninomiya would want to have weekly meetings in the studio with him. Based on his experience with other songwriters, some of which have eventually gone on to become friends after a few collaborations, he normally only gets to hear rough demos and a couple of takes after final arrangements are done. He's never been able to hear a song take shape week after week and he'd be lying if he said he wasn't excited to see Ninomiya's unique creative process first-hand. 

As he reaches the third floor and enters Ninomiya's studio, the front desk staff greets him politely and shows him into the same lounge room as last time. Jun opts to stand and distracts himself by watching out of the large window. He checks his reflection briefly, this time he's made a point to wear casual clothes and is wearing a black hoodie and grey slacks. Looking past his bespectacled reflection towards the veranda adjacent to the living room, he sees a few potted plants with what look like tomatoes and cucumbers growing.

"Ah! Jun-pon!" calls a voice from behind.

Jun turns around to find Ninomiya - that is, Nino - standing a few metres away. He's wearing a t-shirt with a smiley face on it that Jun seems to recall is from an anime he can't quite place and instead of a gaming console he's holding a CD case in his hand this time.

"I was studying for our meeting." He says, lifting the CD and Jun is greeted by his own face on the cover of their latest "best of" record. 

Without waiting for an answer he walks over to the kitchen counter, placing the CD on top before heading towards the coffee maker at the back. 

"I've obviously heard most of these on TV, but I wanted to listen properly... Do you want tea or coffee?" He asks in a laid-back tone.

Jun takes up the offer this time "Coffee, please." 

And he hates himself a little when he meekly adds "I'll have whatever you're having" trying to pass it off as not wanting to inconvenience Nino but deep down simply wanting to find out how he likes his coffee.

Nino smiles while pouring the coffee "No need to be so considerate, Jun-pon."

Once he's done, he passes a mug to Jun over the counter, just black with a generous spoonful of sugar, and stands in front of him with both hands flat on the counter. When he leans on them, his elbows stick out at a weird angle that no human limb should.

Looking straight at him, he starts talking in a serious tone Jun is hearing for the first time in their short acquaintance "If I'm going to be writing this song, I want to understand what is the driving force behind the group... its DNA, if you will." He raises his mug to his lips, steam blurring his intense stare for a moment, then carries on. "Frankly, these songs are okay, they're fun to listen to. But I want to make something that will make people go 'ah, this is really them'." He says, gesturing towards the CD lying close by.

Jun chooses to ignore his rising indignation at the fact that Nino just called his best work _okay_. He takes a long sip of the hot, much too bitter for his taste, coffee to let his feelings subside and launches into a speech about the anniversary tour and the feelings they want to convey as a group. 

Nino's expression is unreadable to Jun as he listens attentively to his words, but his brow furrows once Jun is finished talking.

"That's a good PR pitch, but we're going to have to do better than that. I need something more... raw. Like your letter. The thing is, Jun-pon, I want my songs to be honest. None of those silly idol clichés."

The idol thing again. Even if Nino insists on wanting to steer clear of idols, Jun has been working in the industry for so long that even if he tried to separate both, the line between himself and his idol persona is too blurry. Maybe it doesn't even exist. He stays silent for a while, looking out the window, unsure of how to respond.

Possibly sensing Jun's hesitation, Nino lets ot a loud sigh "I can see it will be hard work, but don't worry. I will make it happen, I am a genius songwriter after all. I'm going to drag what I need out of you." Nino says with a dark, almost menacing smirk on his face "Then you'll have the Oricon number one single and I will get a buttload of money. No hard feelings."

Never meet your heroes, Jun thinks bitterly.

Jun is too distracted reviewing the concert pamphlet test print to notice someone approaching and jumps in his seat when he feels a hand on his shoulder. He turns to find Sho smiling at him with a bento in the hand that's not resting on his shoulder.

"Sorry, I tried calling you but you were in the zone." He says sheepishly before settling on the chair next to Jun.

Jun puts aside the pages he was working on, now full of scribbles and annotations. "I didn't know you were in the office today. We should have gone for lunch together." He says.

"Do you even have time for that?" Sho asks as he opens the bento box, revealing a generous portion of mackerel covered in glistening miso glaze, rice and some neatly arranged vegetable side dishes.

His stomach cramps with hunger at the sight of the food, making him realise he's completely forgotten about lunch again.

"I hear you're working with Ninomiya Kazunari. How's that going?" Sho asks casually while picking at the pickled seaweed salad with his chopsticks.

Jun can't be certain if Sho has heard something around the office, or if he's just curious. He buries his face in his palms and lets out a muffled groan. With Sho being one of his older friends in the agency, there's no need to hide his frustration.

"That good, huh?" He asks, not without a hint of humour in his voice, as Jun launches on a detailed account of his interactions with Nino. 

After three meetings, things have settled into a predictable pattern. Every Thursday afternoon, Nino plays rough demos on his laptop for Jun and he will go over the different sections on the studio piano or on his guitar and sing on top with vague lyrics ideas. This is Jun's favourite part, and he's still not entirely over the high of getting to see Nino at work so closely. However, Nino is still as difficult as when they first met and his sharp remarks still as abundant. Jun's feedback and suggestions are often met with condescending smirks and eyerolls, which traumatised him the first time but has since become immune to. As much as Jun is sure he will love the finished song (he still is his favourite songwriter after all), he will be just as happy to never having to work with Nino again.

When Jun finishes his speech, he reaches for the water bottle in front of him while waiting for some sort of comforting words from his friend. 

"I don't think you're being fair, Matsujun." Is what Sho says instead.

Jun tries to ignore his blood temperature rising with indignation within his veins. He values Sho's opinion enough to keep quiet and wait for the older man to elaborate. However, Sho shoves another piece of mackerel with miso in his mouth and chews thoroughly, a blissful expression on his face, his cheeks round like a squirrel's as he savours his lunch. He finally swallows and looks straight at Jun.

"What I'm saying is you have spent years idolising this person through their music. Of course they can't live up to your expectations. No one would. You've been building up this ideal image in your mind." He explains patiently. "His methods might be unconventional but they seem to be working, is he really that bad? Or are you just annoyed because he's not like you expected him to be?" Having made his point, he shovels some pickles and rice in his mouth.

Sho has a point. Jun hates when Sho has a point. He can dismantle Jun's opinions so easily, making him feel stupid to have failed to notice things that only become obvious after Sho points them out. Yet Sho always offers his opinion kindly and objectively and that's what makes Jun trust his judgement more than anyone else's. Sho's warm expression as he talks between bites takes Jun back to their junior days, when they had both just joined the agency and were all long skinny limbs and toothy grins. He was devastated, but not surprised, when Sho decided to quit to become a lawyer and found it hilarious when he came back to join the agency's legal team.

Jun was in awe at Sho since the very moment they met. So smart and straightforward, with a rebellious streak. He had never met anyone as unpredictable as him among his school friends or even among his older sister's friends, who young Jun had thought so cool before. That was true still today, Jun has met many people through work, but never anyone quite like Sho. The same could be said about Nino, Jun admits begrudgingly.

If he tries, will he be able to see Nino for who he is, and not for what Jun expects him to be?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A kitten is probably the last animal he'd choose to describe Nino. A hedgehog, a sea urchin, a crab. Maybe a lion if he's being generous, one like the evil uncle in The Lion King.

The usual member of staff greets him with a small bow of the head, already used to Jun's presence in the office once a week and tells him Ninomiya-san is waiting for him in the recording studio. Jun thanks her and walks down the corridor that has become familiar by now. He reaches the door and makes sure to check that the red light above it is off before turning the door handle, a lesson learned after he missed it once and Nino berated him for ruining what he claimed was " _the perfect take_ ". As he pushes the heavy wooden door open, music starts seeping out of the room. It's none of the demos he has heard until now nor one of Nino's published songs, the melody is completely new to Jun. Nino is sitting at the piano, his head slightly bowed with his eyes closed under his fringe. Jun's eyes follow his fingers as they press down on the keys softly, creating a languid, somewhat nostalgic melody. He stays rooted on the spot, not daring even to breathe.

Nino's hands eventually slow down, his fingers punctuating the last notes of the tune and finally coming to a halt and moving to rest on his knees. As if sensing a presence he turns towards the door, where Jun is still frozen, his own hand forgotten on the door handle. 

"Ha? Why are you crying?" Nino's pitch is high, eyes suddenly wide with surprise.

Jun manages only an embarrassing squeaky voice through his sniffles "I don't know. I was just moved. It's a beautiful melody, so before I realised..."

He half turns towards the door as he wipes the tears away hastily with the back of his hand, expecting Nino to laugh at him and, honestly, he wouldn't blame him. Jun wouldn't say he cries often, but he can get emotional over art sometimes. Usually he tries to make sure it happens in private or at least behind sunglasses and definitely not in the recording studio of his favourite songwriter, who is currently looking at him with a bewildered expression.

Nino looks away as if he's the one that is embarrassed instead and for a second Jun thinks he can see the tips of his ears reddening slightly. He clears his throat before speaking again "Come on, sit down and let's start. I have a new variation of the B melody to show you."

After the session is over and Jun is getting ready to leave, he is surprised to see Nino sit back at the piano instead of heading to the lounge for his customary break.

"Are you not coming outside?" he asks.

"I'm going to work on this for a bit longer. I saw _something_ great today, so I am feeling inspired" he answers with a sardonic smile.

Jun leaves the room without even deigning to answer that and the door closes behin him to the sound of Nino's merry laughter.

Of all the type of jobs Jun does as an idol he is suited to TV shows the least. He's not naturally inclined to lively chatter and it takes him a lot of effort and concentration to follow the pace on talk shows and variety programs, often relying on his more MC-oriented fellow group members to set the mood. On such days, he often goes to bed as soon as he gets home in the evening, too exhausted to even eat or take a bath. On music specials he does a bit better, the performance part he obviously doesn't have a problem with but still, sitting during the talk sections inbetween acts and idly waiting in the sterile green room deep within the TV station building is plain torture to him. He tries to stay productive by bringing his laptop with him to catch up on his producer work during the downtime. Sometimes he'll pop into the set and observe the production staff at work, which occasionally can spark new ideas to use in his own productions.

Today, Jun is lucky. He is hanging around the studio set, looking over at the stage design for their performance later. He crouches down to get a closer look at one of the props when hears a familiar voice behind him.

"Oi, Matsumoto! Stop noseing around the set, you're bothering the staff!"

Jun looks over his shoulder with a grin "I forgot you were on today too."

Hoshino Gen is standing next to a mess of spare cables and backup lighting equipment. "I knew I'd find you here. I dropped by your green room and nobody knew where you had disappeared to." He closes the distance and stretches out his hand. Jun takes it to propel himself up and pats his friend on the back.

"I'm glad to see you, I was starting to get bored of waiting."

"I had my manager bring that coffee maker I told you about to my green room, so I don't have to suffer that lukewarm water from the vending machines here. I even have Hawaiian Kona coffee beans. Want to stop by?" Gen offers.

It would take a lot less than specialty coffee to entice Jun away from the stage or the dull routine of his own green room. But the memory of the watery yet unexplicably bitter signature blend of the TV station makes the offer all the more appealing. He follows Gen through a labyrinth of corridors they both know by heart after numerous appearances, the sameness of its cream coloured walls and dark grey carpet broken here and there by posters advertising the latest TV shows, start date and time highlighted in bold typography. Gen's green room is very much the same as his albeit smaller, being meant for a single occupant. Jun spots the shiny metallic coffee machine and a hand grinder next to it and thanks whatever lucky stars brought Gen and him together today. 

Jun met Gen through Shun, who is at the center of his social group and has a remarkable ability for attracting and gathering individuals from across all the entertainment world to his friend circle. It's something that Jun is grateful for. Being definitely shy on first meetings, he owes Shun the introduction to several of his closest friends, Gen included.

Sitting comfortably on the sofas at the corner of the room, they chat leisurely and catch up on what the other has been up to since they last met. After the second cup of delicious, smooth coffee the conversation turns to Nino, as it happens much too often lately. Gen, being a successful songwriter himself, has a lot of questions about Nino and is curious about his ways of working. Jun replies carefully, selecting which bits to share, not wanting to betray Nino's trust. But being in the same line of work, Gen and Nino share a lot of connections and common acquaintaces and after a while, it's Jun who is learning new facts about Nino from his friend.

Gen narrows his eyes and brings his index finger to his temple as if he's trying to remember something. "He was working with JumpStart a few years ago, right?" He asks.

Jun nods, he heard about that at the time. Although nothing came out of that collaboration, it was the only time Nino worked with an idol group. If Jun cared about such things, he could say JumpStart were their rivals. They are part of a different agency and both groups debuted only a few months apart, thus being pitted against each other by the press to promote sales. 

"It might only be a rumour, but I heard that Yamashita did him dirty. I don't know the details but some said he took credit for some of his songs and published them without Ninomiya knowing." He tells Jun plainly, before adding his own evaluation. "It might not be true, I mean... Ninomiya would probably have sued him for copyright infringement if that was the case, right?"

Gen is right, most people would sue for something like that, but Nino is not most people. That Nino, who doesn't care about business terms and writes the music he likes for whoever he wants to, would have never made the effort to go into legal claims. The more he thinks about it, the more he believes the rumour to be true. He wonders if this is what's behind Nino's dislike for idol bands.

Jun doesn't disclose his own suspicion about this newly acquired piece of information to Gen though, he finishes the remains of coffee in his mug pondering in silence. His indignation rising on behalf of Nino, stemming from a brand new (and somewhat unfounded, Jun thinks) sense of loyalty blooming inside him.

His thoughts are interrupted by a knock at the door followed by "Excuse me, I'm looking for Matsumoto-san." coming from the outside. Jun responds and a few seconds after, Jun's manager's head appears timidly through the gap. "Matsumoto-san, it's time to go to hair and make-up."

The next Thursday session drags on until the evening. By the time Jun emerges from the recording studio, the sky is ablaze with orange and the golden light bathes the living area of Nino's office. He walks to the window to admire the dusk falling over Tokyo and stretches lazily, arms shooting upwards. After a few minutes Nino follows, the door to the recording studio closing with a soft thud behind him. He walks over to the kitchen to leave his empty coffee mug in the sink and looks over to Jun by the window.

"I'm heading out now. Do you want a lift home?" He asks.

Jun is momentarily taken aback by the offer. They have never spent any time together aside from their meetings and Jun was certainly not expecting to. Nino's attitude towards him hasn't given him any clues to suggest he'd want to have anything to do with him outside of their current project. He's probably overthinking this and Nino is just trying to be nice for once. Too aware he's taking too long to respond and Nino is leaning on the counter eyeing him curiously, he accepts, feeling glad that his manager hadn't lined up a car to pick him up already.

"This is not the way to my house." Jun warns Nino as he guides the car to join the expressway past Roppongi.

"I thought we could take a little detour. Do you like Chinese food?" 

Jun stares at his companion, who keeps his eyes on the road and starts to whistle, paying him no notice. He slumps back in the passenger seat and watches in resignation as Nino's small hands fiddle with the smart screen on the dashboard until music starts playing. The first notes of a famous J-rock song fill the car. It's not like he's worried about having to make small talk with Nino, he's comfortable enough with him by now, but he's glad to at least be able to relax for a bit in silence during the forced drive who knows where.

40 minutes later Nino finally stops the car and turns off the engine in a parking space outside an unremarkable building with a white and blue sign reading China House in front. He gets off and Jun follows.

"We had to come all the way to Chiba to eat Chinese food?" He asks incredulous, looking at the unassuming entrance, where slightly faded photos of a handful of dishes are on display.

"My friend's family owns this shop. I guarantee it's the best you'll taste in Japan." Nino replies, walking towards the door. Jun follows a few paces behind.

The restaurant is empty when they step inside, not surprising this late on a weekday night. There's only one bored-looking man perched on a stool by the register close to the door reading what looks like Shonen Jump magazine. His hair is light brown and fluffy like a poodle's. He looks up almost mechanically "Welco- ah, it's you Nino." 

When he looks past the songwriter and spots Jun, his eyes become round with surprise.

"Eeeh? You didn't tell me you know Matsujun!" he exclaims, clapping his hands in glee. "You should have told me! Mum! Mum! Look, it's Matsujun!" He yells in the direction of the kitchen, then turning to Jun again with a grin "My mum is such a big fan!"

A middle aged woman that Jun assumes is the poodle's mother emerges from the kitchen matching his son's excitement. In under five minutes Jun is hugged, sat down at a large table and presented with at least a dozen different starters in small porcelain dishes while his son brings out the restaurant's best wine, among Nino's loud protests that he is not going to pay for any of that. 

Aiba's - which Jun learns is the name of Nino's friend - animated exuberance is an extreme contrast to Nino's prickly disposition. Jun can't help but wonder how such a mismatched pair ended up as close friends but witnessing their interactions during the meal, with Aiba animatedly recounting any minor anecdote and Nino's subsequent remarks sending him into fits of laughter, he comes to realise they share the kind of intimacy that only people who have grown up together have. He can't help but feel somewhat lonely when he's inevitably left out of their inside jokes, but Aiba is a wonderful host and he keeps Jun's glass full as he fills him in his and Nino's adventures as children in between mouthfuls of chilli fried chicken.

Mrs. Aiba only relents and stops bringing out more delicious food when Jun assures her that if he eats one more dumpling he's not going to be able to dance the next day, but not without insisting that he tries some of her homemade sweet tofu for dessert. Nino gets up and follows her to the kitchen, disappearing behind the crimson and gold fabric curtains.

Aiba fills up Jun's glass once more and looks at him with a gentle smile on his lips.

"I'm glad Nino has someone like you. He doesn't have many friends and tends to keep to himself, always locked in his studio working or playing games. Well... it's just the way he's always been, but I'm relieved to see you two are getting along well."

"No, I don't think we're that close really." Jun says weakly. He doesn't want to disappoint Aiba, who clearly cares a lot about his friend but he can't be dishonest about it either.

Aiba ignores Jun's comment and leans in closer, lowering his voice to a whisper "Don't let yourself be fooled, Matsujun. He likes to act tough but this guy is as soft as a baby kitten."

Even if Aiba says that, a kitten is probably the last animal he'd choose to describe Nino. A hedgehog, a sea urchin, a crab. Maybe a lion if he's being generous, one like the evil uncle in The Lion King. But a kitten? Jun arches his brows in disbelief.

The doubtful expression is not missed by Aiba, who erupts in laughter while slapping his knee. "Ah, you don't believe me!" he exclaims.

Emerging from the kitchen and balancing a tray in one hand, Nino scowls at Aiba, "Don't say any unnecessary stuff."

"Of course not. You know me, I only say necessary stuff." he replies good-humoredly, scrunching up his face towards Jun in what looks like an attempt to wink. Nino puts down the tray and places an earthenware teapot, three small cups and a generous portion of the sweet tofu on the table. 

Jun pours himself a cup of what turns out to be fragant jasmine tea and eats enough tofu so that Mrs. Aiba won't be displeased.

"I can see why you like Matsujun so much, Nino. He's very interesting." Aiba says, out of the blue.

Jun lets out a sarcastic chuckle. Nino likes him? More like he barely tolerates him, he's made that abundantly clear. But instead of laughing at the joke or correcting his friend with a witty comeback at Jun's expense as he expects, Nino smiles and tilts his head to the side "Isn't he?" he says in a cute voice and Jun almost chokes on his tea.

It's past midnight by the time they finally make it out of the restaurant. Jun has to admit Nino was right and the food is outstanding, it's a pity it's too far to come regularly, but he happily swings a plastic bag with takeaway that Mrs. Aiba insisted he brings back home with him and is enough to last him the rest of the week. He's a bit tipsy from the wine and smiles blissfully clutching the bag as he climbs into the passenger seat.

"Don't forget to put on your seatbelt, J. I don't want your agency suing me if you smash that pretty face against the windshield."

Jun rolls his eyes at Nino's newly coined nickname, not sure if it's an upgrade or a downgrade from the previous one. "If you really must use a nickname, you can just call me Matsujun, you know?"

"Hmm... but that would be just like everyone else. It's boring." Nino replies distractedly while starting the car and backing out of the parking spot. 

Unlike before, on the way back Nino doesn't play any music. They sit in silence and when it starts raining, the drumming of the raindrops falling on the car's roof and the steady rythm of the windshield wipers are all Jun can hear. He looks out at the blurred-out scenery past the shiny raindrop trails on the passenger side window and thinks about the next day's schedule. It's Nino who speaks first when they drive past a billboard with Jun's blown-up photo on it, endorsing a brand of chocolate.

"It must be heavy, right?" Nino asks quietly. Jun doesn't reply and simply looks at him with a raised eyebrow. "The weight of all these peoples' expectations." He adds.

After a pause, he continues "I didn't even get to a tiny fraction of your level and I had to quit already. It got so heavy it was unbearable."

Jun turns back to stare out the window again. He's not used to people asking this sort of thing. Usually people are envious, picturing a life of fame and luxury, ignoring the hard work and the pressure that comes with it, so carefully hidden behind his and his fellow group members' smiles on TV and magazine covers. When he doesn't reply, Nino carries on.

"I can't imagine how it must be for idols, it's hard enough when you're just a musician... some fans would send me letters saying ' _Your music keeps me alive'_ and things like that. I am grateful of course, if it weren't for the fans, I wouldn't be able to make the music I love for a living. But at some point it became too heavy. I started thinking... What if I make a bad record? Will they be disappointed? What if it becomes not enough to keep someone wanting to live?" He lets out a strained laugh devoid of any merriment. "I guess it's impossible for someone like me." 

"It's heavy. It's so heavy I feel like I will be crushed. But when someone says ' _Your music saved me'_ somehow I also feel saved..." Jun lets the thought hang in the air, floating in the secure microcosmos of Nino's car. He feels a familar tingling on the sides of his nose and closes his eyes before tears can threaten to spill out. 

Pretending to sleep, his head propped against the space between the headrest and the window, he doesn't see the soft smile forming on Nino's lips as he glances in his direction while the car speeds towards the towering buildings of Tokyo in the distance.

As the tour approaches, preparations start to accelerate at a dizzying pace. Jun dives in head first. He sits through costume fittings, selecting trims and suitable patterns for each of the blocks of the performance. He goes over their stage positions and the transitions between songs with the stage managers, marking changes to the flow in a bright red marker on the latest printed draft. He sneaks in some dance practice when he can, relying on one of the choreographers to stand in for him in group rehearsals half of the time, with a blind hope that he'll have the steps memorised when the curtain finally opens. When he gets home at night, he switches on his laptop for video calls with the stage effects and lighting designers in London, who are just waking up for the work day ahead. He ignores the frustration in their faces as he makes yet another request. And every Thursday like clockwork he goes to Daikanyama to meet with Nino for the anniversary song. The quiet atmosphere at Nino's studio is world's apart from his group's busy rehearsal space and Jun relishes in it for the duration of their sessions. The song is outstanding even in its raw current state and only adds to Jun's trepidation for the upcoming tour. If he could, he would pat himself on the back for succeeding at getting Nino to write this song for them.

Winding down in front of Nino's floor-to-ceiling window at the end of his meetings has become Jun's unconcious new habit. As he stares outside at the streets of Daikanyama with people rushing or leisurely strolling below them unaware, a hydrangea in full bloom on Nino's veranda catches his eye. Its purple flowers like fluffy clouds, so big that the stalks are straining to support them. A perfect picture of summer.

"I thought you only grew vegetables" Jun comments when Nino joins him in looking out of the window, holding a glass with iced oolong tea in his hand.

Nino smiles fondly, following Jun's gaze towards the flowers "It's just like you, right? That one." He says.

Jun furrows his brow "How so?"

Nino points one finger towards the plant outside "A summer child in a dazzling shade of purple. It reminded me of you, so I bought it."

Jun feels the all too familiar rush of blood to his face, his ears feel hot and he just knows he is blushing like a goddamn shoujo manga heroine. Fuck Nino and his ability to embarrass him. He hopes the partial shadows that fall on the room as the sun descends are enough to keep Nino from noticing but, as he sneaks a glance from the corner of his eye, Nino is looking straight at him and lets out an amused chuckle. "You don't have to take it so seriously, J. I was just kidding." He says before finishing his tea and heading back to the kitchen, leaving Jun to deal with his quickened pulse and a weird feeling in his stomach that he can't quite decipher.

Nino plays him like a fiddle. He knows exactly which buttons to press to get the reaction he wants out of him and Jun hates it. But along with his frustration, seeing Nino's stupid self-satisfied smile every time he falls for one of his tricks also triggers an inexplicable rush of satisfaction, like he wants to keep indulging him, and it makes Jun loathe himself even more for it. 

When Jun reccounts Sho the latest details about his meetings with Nino over drinks at a bar near the office one night, his friend wastes no time in describing Jun's feelings better than he understands them himself. He'll never cease to be equal parts amazed and annoyed at Sho's talent in seeing right through him. 

"You hate it because you're not in control, he's got the upper hand and he's throwing you off balance. But you're secretly loving it because it brings a sense of thrill." Sho explains plainly.

Jun sulks because deep down he knows Sho is right. Sho is always right, damn him. He drinks the remaining whisky in his glass in one go and signals at the bartender for another one.

Sho takes advantage of his silence to deliver the final blow. "You don't know what he's going to do next and, the worst part is you're dying to find out."

Jun groans. For all his accuracy, he wishes Sho would stop psychoanalysing him and making him see the hard truth. He puts it as if he's fascinated with Nino. And maybe he is. Just a little bit.

Sho is eyeing him suspiciously as Jun takes a sip from his newly poured whisky.

"I can't say I'm not a bit worried though."

Jun turns to look at him. "What do you mean?"

Sho meets his gaze. "You can be really oblivious sometimes..." There's a pause before he shrugs lightly. "Well... do your best, OK?" He pats him on the shoulder and turns his attention back to his own drink, leaving Jun none the wiser.

The rainy season comes to an end and August arrives before Jun even has time to realise, still neck deep in the preparations for the tour in the autumn. The weather has turned hot and sticky, but Jun gets cold easily so he doesn't mind. He is sitting in front of his TV as he dries his hair after an afternoon shower, much needed after an intense dance rehearsal, distractedly listening to the latest typhoon warning, expected to hit Tokyo that evening, to the usual recommendations to avoid going out unless necessary. Jun sighs. He doesn't mind the summer heat, but he hates typhoon season interfering with his plans.

After he finishes drying his hair, never able to make it look as good as one of his hairdressers even after following their advice diligently, he heads to the kitchen and opens the fridge to find the bento his dietician prepared for days like this, when he's in a rush and has no time to cook. Jun enjoys cooking his own meals, but at least he has the comfort of knowing it will be nutritious and he won't have to do extra sets at the gym to compensate. He's tired and busy enough as it is. He sits on a stool by the kitchen counter and opens the box to reveal a colourful salad, with carrots and beets cut in the shape of flowers, arranged neatly among a sea of greens with grains scattered on top. He digs in and doesn't even register the taste, already lost in his thoughts.

The middle section of the concert is turning out to be a headache with too many songs to choose from, and the transition between the solos still needs work. But the biggest missing piece is the anniversary song. He frowns and picks up a chunk of cucumber with the fork. Even though Nino is making good progress and Jun has no doubt in his abilities, he can't proceed with planning for the anniversary section without the song itself, and it's going to be a few more weeks until it's ready. Will he have enough time?

As if on cue, a sudden notification sound from his phone brings his mind back to the room. "Ninomiya" blinks in the messaging app alert. He unlocks his smartphone with his free hand.

_I have been working on some new arrangements I want you to hear. Stop by today._

Jun can picture Nino hunched over the phone, typing the message with quick fingers, a result of all the hours spent gaming, and smiles to himself. Surely the Jun from over a month ago would have been annoyed at such a casually demanding message, bordering on rude. But the Jun that has gotten to know Nino over the past few weeks can feel the excitement bouncing off the songwriter's brief and to-the-point message. He can't wait to hear whatever magic Nino has been doing.

 _Give me an hour_ he replies, which gives him just enough time to finish his lunch and get dressed before dashing out.

When he steps outside, the sky is low with ominous dark clouds that make the city look like a scene from a post-apocalyptic movie in the eerie light. He briefly recalls the typhoon warning from earlier as he flags down a taxi a few metres from his apartment building. "Well, too late now" he thinks to himself, settling in the back seat of the car. If he's lucky he might get back before it gets bad.

Except he isn't and he doesn't. 

By the time he and Nino are ready to wrap up the meeting, Jun is in high spirits about the song finally taking shape, but quickly deflates at the sight that greets him as he steps out into the living area now dark and silent as the staff left hours ago. Burrowed in the sound-proofed recording studio, they toiled away blissfully unaware of how the wind has picked up and the rain batters the large window in the studio brutally. He hears the recording room door close and Nino's quick steps behind him.

"Hey, J, about the second bridge. I think if we add some more strings... oh, fuck." Nino says, approaching the window and joining Jun.

They stand side by side silently, contemplating the storm outside before Nino speaks again "Um... There's a spare room upstairs. If you can't find a way to get home... well, I mean... I guess it's probably safer if you stay here." He sounds hesitant, as if he's cautiously selecting his words.

It's so out of character for the Nino that he is used to, loud and witty, that Jun throws him a curious look. To his surprise, against the pale blue light that enters through the window, with eyes cast down, Nino looks almost shy. Jun considers the offer. Trains are out of the question in this weather. He could call his manager to send over one of the agency cars, but the thought of making one of their staff leave the safety of their homes to drive him in a typhoon is enough to make him discard the idea straight away. He is out of options.

"Thanks, but I don't want to intrude. I will just wait here until it passes."

"Don't be ridiculous. It wouldn't be able to sleep thinking there's someone sneaking around the studio unsupervised."

"I'll try not to be a nuisance, then." He says with a small bow of the head.

Nino's face returns to his usual expression, as if he's relieved to hear him accept his offer, and with a "let's go, then" he leads the way to a door to the left side of the reception room that gives access to the stairs to the second floor, Nino's living space.

Jun follows behind and is shown into a spacious open living area with two large windows similar to the one below in the studio. The pounding rain continues falling down, pummeling the thick glass carried by strong gusts of wind. Nino presses a button on the wall next to the light switch and the blinds close automatically with a soft whirring sound. The room is dominated by a large TV and Jun can see all the modern gaming consoles arranged neatly in the cabinet under it, along with what's possibly boxes of every single videogame in existence. The rest of the room is simply decorated with white walls and wood accents and theres some luscious potted plants that Nino must be taking good care of, judging by the healthy look of them.

There is an open kitchen similar to the one below but better stocked with pans and cooking utensils instead of sweets and snacks. Nino walks around the counter that separates the kitchen from the living room. "Do you want a drink while you wait for dinner? I have beer and... uhm, some expensive nihonshu someone brought as a gift."

Jun chooses beer although he prefers nihonshu, not wanting to have a nice gift for Nino wasted on him. Nino passes the beer bottle to Jun before heading to the kitchen and pulling knives and a chopping board from the cabinets. He refuses his offers of help, which Jun understands as he also prefers to cook by himself and is annoyed when clueless well-intentioned guests try to help, so he chooses the wall next to the kitchen entrance to lean against and settles on watching Nino's progress between swigs of beer.

"I should've chosen a pet that was easier to keep." Nino mutters while rummaging through the contents of his fridge.

"Do you have a pet?" Jun asks, curiously looking around, wondering what kind of animal it will be.

Nino simply points a finger at him, making Jun scoff at the idea. "So I am your pet now?" 

"You look like the type who's fastidious with food. Like you only eat soba from high-end restaurants and protein shakes or something."

That's pretty accurate, Jun has to admit. But he is not about to give Nino the satisfaction of being right, so he opts to stay quiet.

Nino pokes his head out of the fridge and looks at him with a smile on his lips. "Will this fussy nyanko-chan eat hamburger?" He asks.

Jun rolls his eyes at him but he's too amused to be truly annoyed "Complaining about the menu when you're letting me stay would be unpardonably rude."

"Would you feel better if you had a salad to go with it?" Nino asks as he reaches for one of the cupboards and pulls out a bowl. 

"I would, yes."

"Go pick some tomatoes downstairs." He replies, handing it to Jun.

Jun does and comes back upstairs with ten small tomatoes he carefully picked from Nino's pots, trying not to damage the plants with his clumsy fingers unused to the task. When he steps back into the kitchen, Nino is already busy with prep work, chopping up vegetables with swift hand movements.

"Just leave them there." Nino says without looking up from the vegetables on the chopping board.

Jun retreats to his spot by the wall. Once Nino finishes cutting up the celery, carrot and onions he rinses his hands and turns towards him. 

"You can take a bath first, if you want. I'll get you something to change into." He says while checking the bathtub settings on the control panel on the wall. Then he gestures to Jun to follow him down the corridor on the opposite end of the kitchen. Opening the first door on the right, Nino enters what looks like a spare bedroom. Jun can make out a neatly made bed and a small closet from where he's standing, just outside the door. Nino opens the closet and pulls out some clothes that he hands over to him.

Jun stands in the hallway, looking incredulous at the gaudy clothes in his hands. The matching trousers and hoodie, grey with a bold print of red hearts all over, and the t-shirt with a drawing of a shiba puppy in a bowtie printed on the front. "Are these yours?" He asks.

Nino snorts "Of course not, these are Aiba's. He leaves his stuff everywhere when he comes over. I guess it's lucky he left these behind since there's no way you'd fit into any of my clothes." He throws Jun a look and gestures towards Jun's shoulders and chest area before continuing "You probably wouldn't want any of that bursting through the seams."

Within seconds, Jun is blushing furiously. He's thankful that Nino simply turns around and heads back without another word. He stands in the corridor dumbfounded and he can hear a hummed melody and some clanging and clinking coming from the kitchen.

The hot bath doesn't do anything to help his flushed skin subside and by the time he emerges from the bathroom, wearing Aiba's ridiculous coordinate (which Jun has to admit is a pretty good fit size-wise) a mouth-watering smell fills the apartment. He enters the kitchen timidly, still not completely over Nino's previous comment. Nino is occupied serving the hamburger steak, covered in a glossy brown sauce and garnished with roasted vegetables in two plates, but once he's done he turns to look at Jun and scans him from head to toe as if evaluating his creation. Jun feels his throat getting very dry. He blames it on the hot bath he just took.

"I wonder how much I could sell photos of you like this to the gossip magazines for." Nino says with an evil grin.

After dinner, Nino moves to the sofa. He turns on the shiny PS5 sitting under the TV. Jun doesn't know much about gaming, but even he has heard how difficult it is to score one of these, then again, he would expect nothing less from Nino. Jun settles on the other end of the sofa and busies himself responding to work emails and reviewing background video reels on his laptop. Every now and then Nino lets out a groan, Jun glances at the TV from behind his laptop screen when that happens, but he has a hard time following the action in whatever the space shooter game Nino is playing is.

Even if the events that have led to Jun's current situation are perfectly reasonable, the domesticity of this scene is most definitely not. 

Jun is surprised at the ease with which he is getting used to it. He's starting to believe Aiba, in that Nino's bratty attitude is just a façade. Thinking back, aside from his snarky remarks (which he's grown quite fond of, although he will never admit it), Jun doesn't really have anything to hold against him. He has freely admitted Jun into his studio and even though he complained through all of it, he seriously considered his requests and feedback in regards to this song. And Nino is even warmer in the glimpses Jun has gotten of his private time. He has noticed his tender tone when he talks to his tomato plants in the veranda, when he thinks Jun can't hear him, eyes narrowed with concern if he notices yellow spots or bugs on their leaves and bright with delight when the fruit finally ripens. He even let Jun have some of his tomato children in a salad. There's also the way he helped Aiba's mum after they had dinner at their restaurant and how he beamed happily like a child when she handed him some sweets as a reward. So cute.

 _Cute?_ Did he just call Nino cute in his head?

A loud explosiom from Nino's game is a welcome interruption to this dangerous train of thought. Nino throws back his head against the back of the sofa and brings his hands to his face in frustration. Jun attempts to go back to his emails but when Nino shifts and repositions himself on the sofa to start a new game, his stretched out leg makes contact with Jun's side, sending an electric charge down his spine. He stills. The leg doesn't move, so he doesn't dare to either. His eyes are fixed on the email app on the laptop screen but the lines of text are blending together and he can't make out the words. His fingers lie useless and still on the keyboard. Jun's temperature is rising by the second and he wonders if Nino even notices. When he sneaks a glance, there is nothing that hints at anything other than focus on his game on his face.

His mind is spinning. What the fuck.

Suddenly he hears Sho's voice in his head " _You can be really oblivious sometimes_." Is this what he meant?

Sho can't be right. This has to be the one thing Sho is wrong about. This is work. Jun can't, absolutely can't, fall for Nino. 

He closes the laptop abruptly and gets on his feet. Nino throws him a curious look briefly before returning to the action unfolding on the TV. Jun mutters something about the late hour and excuses himself, wishing Nino goodnight before disappearing down the corridor and through the door of the spare room that he hastily closes behind him.

In the dark bedroom, he tries to ignore the growing pit of anxiety opening up in his stomach. He is fucking doomed. And it is all his own doing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Technically this chapter defies the laws of time because it implies that the PS5 launched in the summer instead of in November, but it felt wrong to have Nino play on a PS4.  
> Nino here is probably playing Destiny 2 if you ask me :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jun is not one for dares of a romantic tendency.

The days after his late realisation of his feelings for Nino are a hazy blur for Jun. Unable to face him, he left Nino's home as soon as the sun was up, leaving a note thanking him for the hospitality and citing a non-existent early work commitment as an excuse. At such an early hour the streets were deserted under the pale blue sky that followed the typhoon, so Jun decided to take the train home for a change, hiding under a face mask for added protection from curious eyes. The train ride sobered him up somewhat, allowing him to think. He is attracted to Nino. Stupidly. Like the fanboy he's starting to suspect he's been all this time. And he didn't even see it coming. Setting aside for the moment how embarrassing that is for a 37-year-old man that should know better by now, he devises a plan. The Nino extrication plan. 

He effectively drowns himself in work for the next few weeks, taking on even more side projects and insisting on supervising every small detail. He is in meetings and calls constantly, going back home to sleep for three or four hours, or even staying over at the office. When next Thursday comes around, he texts Nino an apology about a rehearsal that he can't miss and will prevent him from attending their meeting this week. It is not entirely a lie, but Jun could have easily asked a choreographer to stand in for him if he had wanted to. He's not planning on avoiding Nino indefinitely, just a few days, enough to give him room to let his feelings abate.

He travels with his fellow group members to Okinawa for their latest music video location shooting. It comes at a perfect time to put Nino out of his mind. He sleeps better than he's done in months, laughing with the members and staff as they share drinks after work in the guest house they've rented for their stay. He returns to Tokyo energised and feeling invincible. Reassured that he can put his ridiculous crush behind him before any damage has been done.

The following Thursday, Jun doesn't postpone meeting Nino anymore. However, when he arrives at the front door, feeling as if he'd rather be anywhere else in the world, he finds it is locked and Megumi-san, Nino's trusty assistant, isn't at her desk. The studio behind the glass panel next to the solid wooden door is dark and silent. Looking around briefly, he finds a doorbell to the right and presses it. He can't even tell if the doorbell works. He's never had to use it before.

After a couple of minutes he hears movement inside the studio, finally the door opens and Jun's heart skips a beat. He was not prepared for the sight that greets him. Nino in a full suit and his hair styled back revealing his forehead holds the door open. He's even wearing a tie and a pocket square, for fuck's sake. It takes a moment before Jun recovers and realises he's been gaping. He clears his throat.

"Erm... did we not have a meeting today?" He asks, trying to sound casual.

Nino closes the door behind him and walks down the corridor towards the living area. "I have to attend the yearly recording artists awards ceremony tonight." He says.

Jun hadn't realised the ceremony was today. Since his group didn't release an album last year, they are not among the nominees and haven't been invited to attend this time. He wishes Nino would have told him. Not only it would have spared him the trip to Daikanyama but would also have saved him from suffering cardiac arrest at the sight of Nino all dressed up. At the same time, he wouldn't have wanted to miss it. He hates his stupid brain.

"Should I leave for today, then? We can do this next week."

"I thought you could come with me." Nino replies plainly.

Nino can't be seriously asking him out on what feels too much like a fucking date. Not when he's spent so much effort in avoiding him over the past two weeks. Jun is really trying but Nino is making this too difficult.

Jun looks at him to make sure it's not another one of Nino's jokes to get him worked up, but Nino looks serious. He can think of a million reasons why this would be a terrible idea, not least among them how is he supposed to survive a whole evening next to Nino looking like this.

"I can't just show up there like that, there will be press. I don't even have a suit to wear." Nino opens his mouth as if to speak, but Jun beats him to it. "And before you say anything: no, I will not wear Aiba's hand-me-downs." 

"I had your manager drop one off earlier. Will Saint Laurent be enough for his royal highness?" Nino signals Jun to follow him upstairs to the guest room and points to a suit bag lying neatly on the bed. "He also cleared your appearance with your agency PR. They think it will be good promo for the tour." He explains.

"Wait, so you planned all this but you never thought to let me know? What if I say no?" Jun should be used to Nino's unpredictable ways but he still manages to catch him off guard.

He quirks an eyebrow smugly "I know you're not one to miss an industry exclusive party. Especially not when it's about promoting your precious tour."

Jun stares at him incredulous. He's not wrong. 

Nino sighs and shakes his head slightly "Listen J, I have to go there, my agent is making me. I hate interacting with these people. Producers, marketing execs, record company bosses... I was going to bring Aiba with me, but that idiot is busy tonight." He falls silent leaving Jun completely disarmed at this rare display of honesty. But when he looks up, his signature grin is back. "They say Bruno Mars will be there."

He must be the world's biggest idiot.

All things considered, Jun has a great time at the ceremony. Unlike Nino, he likes attending this type of event. He poses for the press in the new season Saint Laurent grey and black suit, answering their questions about the upcoming tour and his collaboration with Nino. Nino puts on an act in front of the reporters, like he's not hating every second of it, and finally exhales with relief as they settle down at their table once inside the venue to watch the ceremony. 

At the reception that follows, Jun finds Gen and introduces him to Nino over the free drinks. He has never seen Nino drink before, considering the one time they had dinner he was driving, but tonight he's really going for it, reasoning that he has to keep it up if he's supposed to exchange pleasantries with these idiots that keep coming to suck up to him. Jun rolls his eyes at the remark, but is secretly happy that Nino doesn't seem to include him in the idiots group.

As the party starts to wind down and guests start to leave, Jun finds himself alone with Nino, leaning against a high round table littered with empty champagne glasses.

"You may not enjoy this kind of party but I'm glad you invited me. I had fun" Jun comments. Nino doesn't reply and he's starting to feel a bit stupid. It's not like he wanted to invite him from the start anyway. "Well I guess it couldn't be helped, since Aiba-san couldn't make it." He adds.

Nino lets out a small chuckle. "That's not it. I just wanted to spend more time with you." He replies.

Jun can feel his heart rate spike. Is this for real? 

Nino holds his gaze for what feel like years to Jun but is probably a few seconds then lets out a small sigh and averts his eyes, looking around the room briefly. When he turns back to look at Jun he has his familiar smirk on his lips. "It's a joke, J. Relax. You don't have to look so troubled."

And Jun just wants to grab Nino by the shoulders and give him a good shake. Tell him to stop saying things that make his heart soar only to pass them off as jokes the next moment. If he looks troubled, whose damn fault is it but Nino's and his flirty ways, his jokes that Jun is unable to make sense of and his stupid beautiful deep brown eyes. But he'd never be able to say anything like this out loud, even if he lived for a thousand years. He's not one for dares of a romantic tendency. So he sulks and grabs a couple of champagne glasses from a waiter that's walking around the crowd, passing one to Nino silently.

As Jun predicted, Nino overdoes it with the free bar and Jun ends up having to send him home by taxi. He would be annoyed at the detour if only Nino didn't look so cute half asleep against his side in the back of the car. Once they get off in front of Nino's building, he props him up with an arm around him to help him to his studio, then up the stairs to his apartment. Nino collapses on the sofa with a loud thud.

"Water! I need water." He groans.

Jun heads to the kitchen to get him a glass of water. His heart squeezes at the sight of Nino curled up in the sofa. He looks even smaller like this. 

Jun admits that it may be a bit low of him to press Nino when he's so out of it, but is he going to have another chance like this? He has never been particularly brave. If he's being honest, he's very much a chicken when it comes to romance.

"Hey Nino, were you really joking a while ago? When you said you wanted to spend time with me?" He asks tentatively.

Nino simply lets out another groan and rolls in the sofa with some difficulty, so that he's facing up. He pulls at his tie in an attempt to loosen it.

Jun insists "Was it really a joke?"

Nino's forearms are sprawled across his face, he rubs them against his eyes, mumbling unintelligibly.

"What?"

"...'course it wasn't."

Silence.

"Ssstupid." Nino slurs drooling a bit on one side of his mouth.

Jun is glad Nino can't see how red his face gets. If he has to judge based on his wildly accelerated pulse, he must be practically fluorescent. He gives Nino the water and props his head up carefully while he drinks so he doesn't spill it. Then Nino collapses on his back again and is snoring in seconds. 

Jun allows himself to plant a small kiss on Nino's head before leaving.

The days before his next appointment with Nino pass at an excruciating slow pace. The song is almost finished. Nino is toiling away at the final arrangements and there's nothing Jun can do but wait. 

As usual, he turns to work to take his mind off things - or in this case, a certain smug songwriter - but he is too distracted and the effects are disastrous. First he forgets half of the choreography for an internet live and he has to spend all night practicing with the head choreographer, then he messes up the time difference and skips an important videocall with the YouTube staff in New York and worst of all, he approves the wrong stage curtain design by mistake, which ends up costing the company an extra few thousand dollars to get remade correctly. It's finally Sho who calls him out "I know you have a lot on your plate, but you're a walking disaster lately and the staff is falling apart without you there to direct them." he tells him over a bowl of hot udon, sitting side by side at the counter of a small shop next to the office. Jun turns deep red in embarrassment. 

He had already decided to get over this ridiculous crush, yet he keeps wavering, swayed by Nino's words on the night of the awards. Stupidly holding onto something that may not even have any further meaning to it. Whatever the relationship they have now is -and Jun can't really say it's strictly work anymore- it should be enough, but he sometimes catches himself wishing for more. Those thoughts are quickly exterminated as soon as they sprout, like weeds on an orchard. He silently vows to do better. 

It takes another two weeks until an email arrives from Nino's assistant to arrange a meeting with their admin team to sign off the contract and deliver the final master of the song. Jun feels both relief and disappointment when he learns that it won't just the two of them in the meeting this time. It will be easier this way.

  
It's the first time Jun has ever been inside the meeting room in Nino's studio, after dozens of visits and even staying overnight once. Then again, he never really had a reason to. He's not surprised to find that it is as bright as the parts of the studio that he does know, with large windows and an abundance of greenery. Next to him at the long wooden table, Takashina-kun, one of Sho's underlings, is going through the clauses in the contract with a woman from Nino's staff Jun has never met. Nino is sitting opposite Jun, at the other side of the table with his feet on the chair and his phone propped up between his knees. Judging from the concentration in his face and the way his fingers are moving, Jun knows he's playing a game. He supresses a smile. 

As the meeting wraps up, representatives from both artists exchange paperwork. It's just a formality. Jun has heard this song and knows Nino has more than delivered. 

Nino gets up from the chair, "Matsumoto-san, can I have a moment?" He asks as he signals towards the door.

Jun shouldn't be that surprised at his own name, but in his defence, it's the first time he's hearing it from Nino. He springs up to his feet and follows him out, across the corridor and into the recording room.

" _Matsumoto-san_?" Jun asks with a smirk once the door closes behind them.

Nino grins "It's good to keep up appearances from time to time."

He sits in the chair in front of the recording console with one foot tucked under him and picks up a padded envelope from a tray to his right. He turns it upside down over his left hand and a memory drive falls out.

"So you got the master for the anniversary single, and this is the other song." He hands him the memory drive.

Jun blinks. "What other song?"

"The other song." Nino repeats, as if hearing it twice will somehow make any more sense for Jun. "The one you liked so much you started crying like a baby."

He still doesn't understand. 

Nino rolls his eyes and stretches his arm out towards Jun with the memory drive on his palm. "I wrote it for you. It's a gift."

When Jun finally grabs it, Nino swivels in his chair nonchalantly and turns his attention towards the recording console. He fiddles with some of the controls then picks up and looks through the notebook with his ideas and notes scribbled in it that he keeps in the room at all times. He doesn't look at him when he speaks. "It's yours, so do whatever you want with it. Record it and publish it or just shove it in a drawer, I don't really care, although I personally think that'd be a waste of my talents." 

"Nino..." he starts, not really knowing what he's about to say.

The songwriter swivels again so he's facing Jun and looks him in the eye. Jun swallows, it suddenly feels like there's something lodged in his throat threatening to choke him to death.

There's a knock at the door and a delay of a few seconds until Nino answers "Yes?", still holding Jun's gaze.

Jun's manager has an apologetic look on his face when he appears behind it. "Sorry, Matsumoto-san but the car is waiting..."

Jun internally curses his manager's timing, but he can't really get mad. He knows his schedule is packed and he will be late to the recording of their TV show this evening if he lags behind. He shoots Nino an apologetic look before bowing and uttering a generic thank you phrase, the words a poor match to what he would really like to convey, if he could.

As expected, everybody loved the anniversary song Nino wrote for them, the smiles on the faces of the group members crowding around Jun in the studio were enough proof. Jun sang to the best of his ability during the recording session but even his best take was no match to Nino's superior vocal range. All that was left was to let the song out in the wild, for their fans to enjoy. 

The other song however he keeps safely stored at home. After the initial shock upon receiving it had passed, he was determined to record it. But when he listened to it at home, he couldn't make up his mind. With his ear close to the speaker he listened to Nino's unadulterated voice as he sang lyrics about a casual stroll around a quiet neighbourhood during a spring day. Charming in its simplicity, it made Jun cry a second time. He realised he wasn't quite ready to share it with the world, so he kept it to himself, locked in a drawer in his living room.

It comes as a bit of a shock how easily he slips back into his old routines from before he met Nino. His Thursday afternoons are no longer occupied and with the loss of Nino, he also regains the comfortable predictability of his day to day. He is more productive at work than ever as they gather momentum to the tour opening show in just two weeks. He stops by less and less at home while going over final checks in their preparations, but tonight is an exception. They are all gathered at an izakaya in Aoyama to celebrate Yasu's birthday. It's been a while since Jun had a relaxed night out and he's thorougly enjoying himself as he partakes on the food and drinks that keep appearing at the long table as if by magic.

It's when he's making his way back from the toilet that he hears a voice call his name. He turns expecting to find one of the staff or maybe a stray fan but he is met with a huge smile and light brown fluffy hair that he remembers all too well from a night in Chiba.

It may be rude to Aiba (whose only fault is to be best friends with the person Jun is trying hard to get over) but he's the last person he wanted to see right now.

He composes himself enough to show a polite smile "Ah, Aiba-san." He notices he's wearing an indigo-coloured apron. "Do you work here?"

"No, I'm just helping Oh-chan out for a few days. Oh-chan... ah, he's the owner" he points towards a bored-looking man cutting fish behind the counter. "He's a good friend of Nino and mine."

The mere mention of Nino makes his stomach flip.

Aiba carries on unaware. "You should come together next time. Oh-chan's special secret dishes that are not on the menu are the best, but he won't serve them to just anyone." He brings a finger to his lips as if he's revealing classified information.

Jun hesitates for a moment. "Well, the song is finished so we're not really... seeing much of each other anymore. So that might be difficult."

Aiba dismisses him with a wave of his hand. "That's nonsense. Even if you're not working together you're still friends. You should call him. Oh-chan's secret wasabi octopus salad is to die for."

Jun lets out a dry laugh in response. When Aiba puts it in such simple words it seems really easy. It's easy enough for Aiba, that's for sure.

"It's a pity you couldn't make it the other day." He says, changing the subject.

"Eh? The other day?" Aiba looks confused.

"I mean when Nino invited you to the awards ceremony but you were busy..."

Aiba looks deep in tought with his fist under his chin, as if he's trying hard to remember. "When was that again? Well... I was kinda busy probably, catching up on the Attack on Titan episodes I missed, but Nino didn't invite me."

Unaware of the bomb he's just dropped on Jun, Aiba flashes him a big smile and excuses himself when the owner calls out to him from behind the counter. Jun goes back to his table and finds the next round of drinks already waiting for him. He joins in a toast to Yasu's health half-heartedly, his brain working overtime trying to process this new piece of information. 

He clearly remembers Nino saying Aiba was too busy to attend, so that means that either Aiba or Nino lied to him. But Aiba has just mentioned it so casually, plus what reason would he have to lie about it? Nino on the other hand... if he didn't ask Aiba, was he planning to ask him all along and tried to make it look like a coincidence by coming up with a reasonable excuse? Jun's stomach flutters. There's a chance he wanted to appear with Jun as a PR move... but that is a valid motive, Nino wouldn't have to lie about it. That night Nino had said he wanted to spend time with Jun, even though he said it was a joke. Does that mean he has a chance? He can't sit still, he's got his heart in his throat.

Jun keeps downing glasses of whisky and more keep coming without him even having to ask for it. There's a buzz of lively conversation around him, but he hasn't been paying attention for a while now. He tries to calm down and think it over for the fiftieth time, as if running through the same data again will bring him any answers. Is there any other logical explanation he's missing? There can't be.

He stands up from the tatami, almost losing his balance at the sudden movement. He's lost track of how many drinks he's had but clearly he's underestimated the number. He can feel some of his companion's eyes on him as the reaches out to the nearest wooden pilllar to steady himself. He says he has to go to nobody in particular and without another word stumbles out of the shop. He hails down a taxi a few metres from the entrance and crawls inside when the door opens automatically. "To Daikanyama" he tells the driver.

The concierge lets him in without any questions, whether it's because he's seen him come and go from Nino's studio lately or because he recognises him from TV, Jun doesn't know. With a nod in his direction, he steps into the elevator and presses the button to the third floor. The elevator which had appeared so unremarkable to him in his previous visits now seems to move at an extraordinary slow pace. He taps his foot impatiently and dashes out as soon as the doors open on the third and final floor. He's at Nino's door in two strides. He rings the bell and waits, and waits. Nothing. He rings again, pressing the button for longer than it's socially acceptable. When he is met with silence again he pulls out his phone from the pocket.

Two rings, a faint click as the other party picks up before speaking "Hello? J?" His voice sounds somewhat muffled.

"I'm outside."

A pause. "Huh? What?"

Jun has his forehead against the door and he can really feel the alcohol. Somewhere inside his foggy brain there's a warning that this may have been a bad idea after all. He chooses not to listen to it. He's come this far after all. "Open the door." he says.

The call cuts off abruptly. After a few seconds a light turns on inside the studio and light footsteps can be heard approaching through the corridor. Jun hears the door being unlocked and when it finally swings open, Nino is there. Nino in a rumpled mustard yellow t-shirt and tousled hair, like he's just woken up. Nino, who takes a look at Jun and steps to the side, wordlessly inviting him in.

Jun follows him through the corridor and can't help but stare at Nino's small back, the way those skinny jeans cling to his legs. He leads him upstairs to the living room that Jun hasn't seen since the night of the awards. The TV is on and shows a game's options menu and there's a blanket draped over the sofa. Nino probably fell asleep while playing. 

Nino stops by the kitchen counter and turns around, eyeing him curiously. "How much did you drink? It's a bit late for a courtesy visit, don't you think?"

When Jun doesn't reply he asks "Do you want some water? I think I have some at room temperature."

His face changes into a concerned expression at Jun's continued silence. Jun stays rooted on the spot, trying hard to find the words to explain why he just barged in in the middle of the night. 

"Jun. Did something happen?"

He looks up. It's the first time Nino has called his name instead of his silly nicknames. If things go south from here, he will at least have this to comfort himself. It's a meager consolation but he'll take it.

Screw it.

He moves to face Nino. "Why did you ask me to go to the recording artists awards with you?" He asks.

"What?"

"Tell me why." Jun insists.

"Did the alcohol give you amnesia? I told you, Aiba was busy."

Jun smiles triumphally. He's got him. "I know you didn't even ask him."

Nino's eyes widen just a fraction under Jun's gaze but Jun doesn't miss it. 

"So?" He's being emboldened by the alcohol in his body and can't stop himself. Not when Nino stays silent, apparently too aware of having been caught in a trap. 

The silence stretches on and all Jun can hear is the thumping of his own heart inside his ears.

"You said you wanted to spend time with me."

"T-that was..." Nino stutters.

Jun is relishing every second watching Nino's armour crack bit by bit. He takes two steps so he's standing right before Nino, mere inches away. "Is it okay if I want to spend time with you too? Right now?"

He is gloating over his victory. Nino is completely disarmed. His face flushed all the way to the tip of his ears, his mouth half open at a loss for words for once. He bends down a bit and speaks directly into Nino's ear. "If you don't want to, you just have to say no..."

From his vantage position he can see Nino shudder and swallow hard. His voice turned into a husky whisper when he finally replies.

"I want to." 

They both move forward at the same time, foreheads almost colliding in their haste as their lips meet in a haphazard, hungry first kiss. Jun feels the adrenaline rush and his hands fly to the back of Nino's head as Nino presses closer. Nino is kissing him hard, in a way that betrays he must have been wanting to do this for some time. His hands move to Jun's sides, slipping under the short sleeves of his shirt and following the contours of Jun's muscular upper arms and shoulders. 

Jun pulls at the fabric on the front of Nino's t-shirt impatiently while manoeuvering backwards towards the sofa. When the back of his legs hits the edge, he lets himself fall back on the soft cushions, pulling Nino along with him and making him gasp in surprise.

It's dizzying. And not just from Nino's weight on top of him. His brain is foggy and he's really starting to regret those drinks now. Nino pulls back a bit, enough to get some room to access Jun's shirt below him. His deft fingers undoing each button in a fraction of a second. The look Nino throws at Jun's exposed chest gives him goosebumps. It's obvious he likes what he's seeing. In his haze, he vaguely recalls how he mentioned his chest once before, hinting at an appreciation of that particular area of Jun's physique that he was dumb enough to miss back then. He will try to remember this. For future reference.

When Nino's head dips, Jun closes his eyes expectantly, but the room starts spinning. He clutches at the blanket in a useless attemp to anchor himself. 

"Jun?"

"Oh, I'm sorry Sleeping Beauty, did I wake you?"

Jun looks around while rubbing his eyes. He turns towards the direction of the voice a bit too quickly, making his head throb in protest. His blurred vision makes out Nino's figure leaning against the door frame. He reaches blindly to the bedside table to his left, patting the surface until he finds his glasses. After putting them on, he takes a look around, confused. He's not in the guest room he stayed in the night of the typhoon. This room is bigger and definitely more lived-in, with a few t-shirts piled on top of a chair next to a wooden wardrobe. There's also a beautiful acoustic guitar on a stand next to the window. This must be Nino's room. Which means he's in Nino's bed. He's still fully clothed, so that's one thing he doesn't need to worry about at least. He looks timidly back at the songwriter standing by the door. With his glasses on now he can make out his wicked grin and Jun just knows he's in big trouble.

"Do you even remember last night?" Nino asks.

Jun swallows with some difficulty and nods slowly. He remembers. He remembers knocking at Nino's door in the middle of the night and kissing him. He remembers feeling giddy and his head spinning and both of them on the sofa fumbling with each other's clothes. Then his memories start to get foggy and he has no idea how he ended up in Nino's bed.

"I don't know, J, but if I was planning on seducing someone, I'd try to at least stay awake."

Jun grabs the pillow next to him on the bed and buries his face in it. He's so embarrassed he wants to disappear, never to be seen again. Be a million miles away from this room. Then he hears Nino laugh and walk over, his slippers rustling against the carpet with each step. The mattress dips under his weight when he sits on the edge of the bed.

Jun feels a hand patting his head lightly "Don't worry, I thought it was hilarious." Nino lets out another chuckle. "Acting like you were going to eat me up for dessert and the next second you're out cold." He can barely finish the sentence though his laughter.

For all his triumphant act last night, Jun feels pretty defeated now, but Nino slips his hand between the pillow and Jun's face and grabs his chin, gently lifting it so he has no choice but to face him. There are unmistakable traces of tears of laughter in Nino's eyes before he closes them as he leans in to place a soft kiss on Jun's lips. When Nino pulls back he smiles fondly at him and the mischievous glint on his eyes that Jun has become accustomed to over the past few months is nowhere to be found. Nino's hand is still resting on Jun's face, his thumb stroking the skin along his jawline. 

Even in his state, with the worst hangover he's had in a long while, Jun is euphoric. His heart is beating wildly inside his chest and he feels warm all over. He brings up his own hand to cover Nino's one which feels new and small under his touch. Nino stares intently at Jun as if he's trying to take in all the details of his face. Then he bends forward and buries his face in the crook of Jun's neck. Nino's lips softly brush against his clavicle, sending shivers down his spine. "I don't think I'll ever get tired of making you blush like this." He says quietly and Jun can feel him smiling against his skin.

After a moment that feels way too short for Jun, Nino pulls back and stands up. He starts walking towards the door. "Why don't you go brush your teeth and have breakfast and then we can pick up from where we left off yesterday." He turns and winks in his direction before disappearing towards the kitchen. 

Jun can no longer tell if he is the victor or the vanquished but he can't find it in himself to care anymore as he springs to his feet with less than perfect balance and stumbles his way to the bathroom.


End file.
